I am now officially into the third trimester of my pregnancy, and it’s time for me to share my thoughts on ways to support the mom to be. It’s been quite the seven months so far, in that I did experience some complications earlier in the pregnancy that have been since managed by a huge team of specialists. I am so, so grateful for their expertise and care as OTC deficiency is rare. And other than that complication, I have had a really good pregnancy. I had relatively no morning sickness, and I’m only now starting to experience real discomfort. Although, I have been extremely emotional since getting pregnant–I have always been that person that just cries when they are stressed or faced with conflict, or even if I feel someone I care about disapproves of me or my actions. I’m emotional that way, and it’s been worse since becoming pregnant. Like, anything can set me off.
But while I have experienced a pregnancy where half the time I forgot I was pregnant, there were times where definitely I needed some support. And, honestly, it’s not that hard to support the mom to be. Here are some ways you can support your pregnant wife, girlfriend, sister, friend, co-worker etc.
Let Her Sit Down
In the second trimester, she might be lightheaded. It’s a pregnancy thing. Lightheadedness can lead to fainting–and no one wants a pregnant woman to fall down. So let the mom to be sit down. Offer her the chair, but don’t be pushy if she says she’s okay. And offer to get up for her if she needs to get something, like a glass of water. It’s a simple courtesy, and some pregnant ladies might not give this a second thought, but I know a lot would be grateful. Being pregnant is exhausting at times and a few extra minutes seated means everything.
Buy the Foods She Craves
You know when you just want the chips? Like, you can almost taste them? Pregnancy is weird this way, the cravings are more…I want to say obsessive. But I’m not sure that is the right word exactly. Anyway, they are different than your usual, I really could go for some chips craving. I haven’t had a ton of cravings, but I have been eating a lot of sour cream and onion chips, specifically from Ruffles. They are the only ones that make me feel mmm mmm good. Another brand simply would not do. So be sure to support the pregnant mom by providing the food she is craving–it really does make her day.
Encourage the Expectant Mom to Take a Break
Remember when I said above pregnancy is exhausting? It really is. There have been many days when I simply lay down and fall asleep–sometimes for two hours! And I am not usually one to nap in the middle of the day. But, being used to being busy, it wasn’t always easy to take myself off to bed for a cat nap. Remind the mom to be that it’s perfectly fine to take breaks–especially if she feels especially fatigued. Offer to run an errand for her, or pick up some extra chores around the house so she’s not worrying about the laundry getting done.
Buy Her a Maternity Pillow
Dads to be, I’m looking at you. Lying down has become increasingly difficult for me–my cute bump is in my way. Really in my way. And once I’m lying down, it’s not comfy at all. I ache in my sides, my bump feels like it’s been drawn into a black hole, and my back hurts. It’s not fun. Turning over is now an Olympic sport and I’ve got five pillows tucked around and under me to assist with getting comfy. I really wish someone had saved me all this effort and simply bought me a nice maternity pillow! One of those big, long squishy ones shaped like a U. So, Dad, get the mother of your child a maternity pillow. She’ll likely thank you with kisses and tears.
Massage on Demand
Again, I’m looking at Dad. I have the oddest back pains in my upper back right now and I’d take a massage from anyone who volunteered. So, if she asks for a massage, don’t put it off or moan and groan about it. Just massage her. Keep in mind, muscles are adjusting in her body and that isn’t comfortable and she might want massages a lot. I know I do. This is one of the best ways to support mom to be.
Encourage Her to Eat Well
I’ve been on a strict diet during my pregnancy–I need to intake a certain amount of protein each day so I’m constantly thinking about protein, and it’s super important for all pregnant women to eat well. We need fruits and veggies and a fair amount of protein. Eat well with your pregnant friend, and don’t discourage her from eating some junk too. A couple of extra cookies aren’t going to hurt. No one wants to be nagged.
Check in on Her
Call your friend for a chat! Ask her day was, how she’s feeling, if she wants to go shopping with you or needs help with anything. Likely, she’ll be perfectly fine and just want to catch up, but it’s always good to let a friend know you are there for them and thinking about them. And she might take you up on your offer to get some ice cream or shop for baby clothes–sometimes we don’t always want to ask for help or support, pregnant or not.
Encourage Her to Practice Self Care
Whether it’s a bath or buying herself something stupid expensive for the last time before baby comes, encourage mom to practice self care. Self care is vital for everyone, and shouldn’t be overlooked by the expectant mom, or the seasoned mom. A mom is no good to her kids if she is run down, stressed and on edge because she doesn’t take a minute to breathe, or any time to take care of herself mentally and physically. So encourage any mom to be you know to do something for herself during her pregnancy. It’s good for her, and it’s good for baby too as stress hormones affect the developing fetus.
There are so many more things you could do to support the expectant mom in your life–buy her a gift, let her cry on your shoulder when she’s emotional–even if it’s over spilled milk because that’s big deal some days–and just let her know you’re there for her as her whole life is changing. It’ll mean the world.
What were some ways you were supported in your pregnancy? Share in the comments below!